The Attack

Today in my morning routine I took a bath. I was playing the impossible game of bubble breaker on my phone when the invasion hit. A close encounter. My head was just above the rim of the tub and my shoulders were resting on that rim. Inches from my elbow, crawling over the rim- a spider. I screamed as I pull my body to the wall, as far away as I can. As if the spider knew he had walked into the wrong room, it tried to turn around and leave. I remember it in slow motion. The spider’s back leg slips as it turns and it stumbles backward. I try to stand knowing it will tumble into my water. Down it falls and up I go, splashing water all over the place. My phone is probably ruined, but I can’t think about that now. I have to get away from the nasty dot that is swirling towards me. I finally rip the curtain open, and as the spider rides the waves closer to me I make the decision to jump out. Water is all over the bathroom, but I don’t care. I set the phone down not sure what action to take. How do I get it out? I glance at the toilet paper, but realize how silly that would be. I reach in and drain the bath water. Our plug is broken, so I have to hold it down the whole time. He isn’t curled into the little ball that he was before, in fact he’s swimming. His legs are out and paddling like crazy. I envision him crawling out of the water and charging me, so I splash him so he’ll drown. Apparently spiders can hold their breath. He reaches for the edge of the tub but can’t hold on. My eyes are glued to his actions. He struggles and struggles to reach the edge, but can’t keep hold of it. He rests in between tries and his rests lengthen in time. I think he is dead, but as he reaches the drain and swirls around, before his final dissent he makes one last attempt. The current pulls him down, too strong for his tired little body.

After drying the bathroom with a ShamWow® and searching every corner of the room, I crawl back into the tub to start the bath water once again. This time it isn’t the relaxing, soothing experience that it usually is. I keep peeking over the rim of the tub to make sure a spider isn’t crawling up the side.

I’m ruined.